Ever heard of the idiom “you change your mind more than you change your underwear?” Yea, me too, many times. It didn’t take long for me to come up with this post because it is all too true for me. Choosing a beverage at Starbucks? Hopefully there IS a long line so I have time to ponder. Browsing the novel of a menu at Cheesecake Factory? I WANT IT ALL! Is that an option? Selecting a type of shampoo? (Smelling them each 12 times before making a decision) Deciding between “this” or “that” when I’m shopping? (Ultimately ending up with both because I just couldn’t decide) These are daily occurrences that complicate my life more than they should. My bank account, too, is suffering from these indecision decisions. The amount of stress I place on myself on a daily basis just trying to make the right decisions is absurd. Short story: My senior year of high school I bought and returned four different prom dresses because I kept going back with my friends (mistake #1) and trying on more every time (mistake #2). Finally chose a gorgeous purple chiffon dress and still have some reservations about it. I can only imagine what it will be like to find the perfect dress one day for my wedding. *Cringe*
For me, being indecisive goes beyond what shoes I will wear or what menu item I will order, it affects my life in many personal ways, too. Luckily I wasn’t one to change my college major five times but trust me, I thought about it. The only reason I didn’t was because my parents were paying for my education (forever grateful!) and ultimately switching majors can be costly and inefficient.
There are so many things I want to do in my life. I want to teach elementary students, I want to be a store owner, I want to be the CEO of a marketing firm, I want to be a furniture designer, the list goes on. I have so many aspirations it scares me. Seriously, I live in fear that I won’t be able to fulfill my dreams in finding something that I’m really good at. I think a lot of 20-somethings are in the same position because for once in your life you’re not being told what to do. Up until now, most of us have either been in school, lived at home or had some kind of outlined path. The world is your oyster, you can do with it what you want and I think that concept is so mind-boggling for some us especially those who have that entrepreneurial mind. There are so many different paths you can take but finding out exactly what it is that you are passionate about is the tricky part. By the time I start thinking technically about a career opportunity I could potentially be good at, I lose motivation and change my mind.
It’s a continuous cycle but I actually kind of love it. I’ve learned that being indecisive isn’t always a bad thing and to embrace that part of who I am because it keeps me thirsty for more. I never stop thinking about the possibilities for me or my future and it really opens up my mind to the world around me. However, we are all mega-aware of the constant struggles that indecisiveness can bring.
- Major life decisions are actually terrifying. Finding and loving a career is challenging. You change your 5 year plan almost daily because one day you wake up wanting to be a veterinarian and the next an interior designer.
- Much the same, you’re constantly debating what-ifs. “Do I actually enjoy my career? Should I try something else? Is that going to be worth it? Ugh I give up.”
- Restaurants are the worst. Thai? Mexican? Japanese? Burgers? THERE ARE JUST TOO MANY OPTIONS.
- You would prefer to just go with the flow. Comedy? Thriller? You don’t want to be the one to debate it.
- You have constant anxiety. Your world isn’t black and white, and living in shades of gray is f*cking stressful.
- You are the worst test-taker. The professors that give tests with A through F answers, I curse the day you were born. Even if you know the answer, there’s always another one that sounds right too.
- You’re a people pleaser at the core. You don’t want any decisions you make to affect people adversely.
- You solicit pretty much everyone’s opinions before figuring out your own. Mom, Dad, grandma, boyfriend, your waiter, your dentist, the owner of your favorite bodega. It’s called an informed decision.
- Pro-con lists are your best friends. You make a pro-con list for everything. Should I go to the gym? Pro, I’ll run off those cupcakes I just ate. Con, it’s raining and a “Friends” marathon is on.
- You get into arguments with people on the reg about why it takes you so long to make decisions. “You can kiss my indecisive ass.”
- Split second decision-making is just not your thing. Do I wave? Do I high-five? What, no that’s lame… Ah where do I sit?
- You will sometimes agonize about the decision you make long after you make it. So, you finally made a decision, Bravo! Now you will immediately wonder if the other option(s) would have been better.
Honestly you wish that everything could just be decided for you, and it’d always be the right decision. Wouldn’t life be so much easier?